| Horror Movie Formulas [message #70925] |
Sun, 08 January 2012 20:55  |
GuitarStrings
Messages: 45
Registered: December 2010
Location: Ohio
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Baron |
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While I'm not the sort to go around watching every little horror movie known to man, I do like checking out new movies. I love to look for movies that will actually scare me.
Unfortunately, the more I watch recent "horrors" the more I find that they use the same formula over and over and over.
1.) If it's a group of people, they'll be wiped off one by one.
2.) Paranormal movies are always wanting to be the next "Sixth Sense" and try to explain the weak twist of an ending for the last 5 minutes.
3.) Say goodbye to cell phones or computers or anything electronic for that matter. They either won't work, are out of battery life, or try to kill you.
4.) The more gore there is the better.
5.) You never get to like the protagonists. They might start out normal, but once they start making the stupid decisions, not running when they should, and not carrying ANY weapons of any kind, you tend to wish for the killer to take them out.
6.) If there's a woman in the movie, she will be scantily-clad at least once if not more.
7.) If there's any type of attempt at a story, the movie will add some mini-romance plot and cue lovemaking scene.
8.) If you think you killed the killer, you'd be wrong. Set the dude on fire, smash him under your car, do something to make sure he's dead. The protagonists usually won't do it.
9.) Don't go out by yourself at night to investigate some weird sound with no weapon but your good looks. Normal people may be curious but at least they carry some kind of protection. Protagonists just head on out with a skip in their step.
10.) Horror movies always want to shock people. They'll add in some creepy CGI effect like a face in the window or something that flashes past the screen. If you use those in moderation, you can expect the audience to be nervous, unsure of when the next scare will pop out. Most horrors can't seem to get this equation right and lose their audience after the first half hour.
Am I right or am I right?
The time I burned my guitar it was like a sacrifice. You sacrifice the things you love. I love my guitar.
Jimi Hendrix
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